Life Lost, Life Gained
by SeekerLuna
Summary: I had sworn to save her and the sparkling and yet... I could not keep that promise. Life is lost and life is gained, such is the circle of life. Goes along with chapter 96 of "Grab It By The Horns" by Mercedes Wolfcry. I suggest reading that before you read this.


**I had permission from Mercedes Wolfcry to use and edit her work. Thank you my dear. **

**I'm sorry I haven't updated anything lately :/ I've been going through some personal issues and it's getting the best of me. Work has also gotten in the way but hopefully I'll get some updates done this week as I have most of it off.**

**Anyway, this was just a little something I thought of doing because of the little bout of depression I'd been in. Mercedes helped me to think of it, though I might also do something else aside from this just to make sure I get it all out :/**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers, it belongs to HasTak. The plot for the story belongs to Mercedes Wolfcry and her story "Grab It By The Horns" as well as her character NightStrider and Whiplash.**

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"Calm down, Whiplash." I ordered. My hands were splayed upon her repaired chassis, holding her down as Ratchet set to welding shut the claw marks in her thighs. The missing part of her leg had been staunched, so it wasn't bleeding anymore. All that was left was the gashes in her thighs. Even her doorwings had been repaired. Whiplash, though, was thrashing and flailing to get away from Ratchet. Starscream was gently holding down her wrists, having moved with us to the med bay, though he could only do so much with one missing arm. First Aid was fetching MoonRacer, as the femme had more knowledge of Seeker physiques then First Aid did. Chromia had went to inform my father of… well… everything, much to my chagrin. Leo and Velocity had gone to find my mother to return little Bo, and to inform my mates of what I was doing in the med bay.

She was snarling and clicking in a panic, trying to get away, though her optics seemed more unfocused then they had been when I was helping her before. I couldn't understand what she was saying, as I do not speak Cybertronian. I clicked softly to her as she then hissed out her words in English. "Let me go! Let me go now! No more pain!"

"Easy, Whiplash." I said, trying to relax my tone like I had heard Moonracer do for Bo, when she had to update one of his virus walls. "We're not hurting you, your mate, or your sparkling."

She keened in distress, and Starscream mirrored her slightly. "Please…" Whiplash begged. "Please, lord Galvatron… No more… No more… I can't take it… Please… my sparkling…" She gave up fighting and fell limp, just keening desperately in her daze.

I flicked my optics over to Starscream, removing my hands from her chassis to feel about for the sparkling in her belly. The sparkling was big, but I didn't really know how long she had been carrying for. "Galvatron did this?"

Starscream keened softly. "Yes. He was angry, I don't know about what though. He went after my Whiplash, mine! I intercepted, offering to take the beating to spare my mate and sparkling." He let off a distressed sound, backing up and pressing his single hand to his face, his arm now free of the energon feed line. "He beat me like he normally would, leaving me temporarily incapacitated… Then he turned on her…" he moved to the wall, banging his injured wings into it as he slid down into a sitting position. His energon dripped down from his stomach and cockpit area due to the new movement for the area. He keened in distress. "I… I was useless!" he growled angrily. "I couldn't get up fast enough! It was seconds, mere seconds! It only took him merely a few damned seconds to do that damage to her!"

I frowned softly as the plates beneath my hands contracted softly for a brief second, the sparkling within shifting uneasily. "Well, your sparkling seems fine." I informed him. "As for your wounds, Starscream, you said they were normally given? This is normal for you?"

"No." he moaned. "No its not… I received these for fighting back, to save my mate, my Whiplash. I fled with her, from Uranus. Galvatron followed, tearing my wings. He… He's here on Earth, somewhere in the middle of this landmass. He wants something, someone, his heir he had howled... And… And the doom-bringer! Unicron. He's within this galaxy. He's coming, fast. He'll be here within the next two earthling months." He babbled.

Well shit. That's…. well, I'd say we're fucked, if what he's babbling is true. If Galvatron is here… then that means he's probably looking for our base! Shit! Activating my comm. link system, I sent the information to my father, and to Prowl. Prowl could come up with the best plan of action… at least I hope. Wait… Two months? That's… close to when I'm due, and when Jazz will be giving birth. Double shit…

I frowned, whispering softly to Ratchet. "How sane does he sound to you?"

Ratchet tsked softly next to me. "This is the sanest he's sounded in millions of vorns, but he's a seeker. Seekers are known for being able to flip moods in a split second." He finished welding a piece of metal onto Whiplash's thigh, having repaired the broken lines and wires inside. "So, perhaps he's crazy, perhaps not."

"I see." I said. I pursed my lip plates and then frowned, my hands picking up on the stomach plates contracting lightly. "How far along do you think she is?"

"I can't tell. Seeker young are large as it is. She's a smaller femme. She could be anywhere from the same gestational time as you are, or she could be to term." He pursed his lip plates softly. "Why do you ask?"

"Her stomach is contracting." He didn't say a thing to my statement, only hummed softly. I looked at Starscream. "How far along is she?"

"Seven earth months." He thrummed. Starscream rubbed his faceplates, not really seeming to care he was bleeding out slowly. "Seekers gestate longer then you ground-pounders."

I frowned at him. "If I were any other bot, and you weren't injured, I'd take offense to that, and I would hurt you further." I sighed, turning back to Whiplash as Ratchet finished welding up her other leg. Gently I checked the position of the sparkling, and from what I could feel, it was in position for birthing. "I'm not going to be able to bend down easily to do this, Ratchet." I said.

Ratchet nodded. "Then I'll do it for you."

"No." Starscream grunted.

I looked at him. "What?"

Starscream stood, towering above us both, intimidating even when missing a limb, a total turn from the panicked mech from just a few minutes ago. "No mech is going to see my femme un-covered, medic or not." His red optics glittered threateningly. "No. I've tolerated his touch on her only to heal her. Only a femme will touch her further. Only a femme who I know won't hurt her." His torn and damaged wings twitched and he eyed me.

I rested a hand softly on my stomach, my sparkling shifting into awareness. "If you want, Moonracer can do it." I said. "I can't bend down that easily, and we don't have any stools in here that are the right height for me to sit on and help her deliver comfortably."

Starscream locked deep and scary red eyes on me, his jagged toothed mouth grinding. His wings rose in a fierce fatherly protectiveness. Well… Okay, there was probably some aggression there too, but I don't think it was directed at me. Or at least I hope not. "You." He said. "Or another carrying femme. Only carrying. Carriers have the instincts required for my protocols to be happy, after what we've dealt with. Anyone else… I will kill them."

I frowned softly and sighed. "Alright. Ratchet? Can you find me some sort of stool for me to sit on? Hopefully one that's tall enough to reach the berth; or give me a few blocks of metal to set on the stool. Perhaps you could also bring Whiplash into full awareness?" I started to rummage through my subspace for what I would need; blankets, towels, cleaning supplies.

…

Some two hours later, I found myself really wishing I wasn't the only carrying femme, mostly due to the fact that Whiplash was incredibly volatile to anyone in the room, save myself due to the nice swell of my stomach. Much to Starscream's aggravation, we had to chain down her hands to the berth. She kept trying to go for her whips hidden in her thigh plating. She had already almost hit Ratchet with one.

Starscream was currently having another arm built and his body repaired by the three medics, and he was sitting practically right next to us, though his legs were at the end of Whiplash's bed. He had pretty much barricaded the door after First Aid and Moonracer had got here, and wasn't letting anyone through; he even managed to bombard my twins outside… But Ratchet helped too, saying they need not be in here with a birthing femme. I had blocked the bond to my family some time ago; sealed myself off from everyone, my mates included. Apparently Chromia had told my father everything, and I do mean everything, while the twins were there discussing something that had to do with sparkling proofing area's of the base, like the weapons locks. None of them took it well, that I had kept something from them.

I dug myself into shit when I told Chromia, Leo, and Velocity the half lie, half-truth. I shouldn't have said anything. I should have just kept walking, and enjoyed my time with them and my break from my sparkling kicking.

Which brings me back to Whiplash. I'm settled on Starscream's knee, fucking awkward I know, as we couldn't set up a stable stool that gave me enough room to deal with Whiplash. "Alright, Whiplash. You're sparkling has decided to start coming down now. Push now, please."

She snarled at me, tightening her hold over Starscream's good hand. "Don't tell me what I know I need to do!"

I drew my eyebrow plates together and sighed. "Come on, Whiplash, enough with the lip. If you put the force behind your words into the force behind your push, then this will all be over _much_ sooner for us both." Gently I leaned forwards and set out the towels to catch the nasty fluids. I extended my little hands from my fingertips up inside her port to wrap around the sparklings head and help guide the little thing down without it snagging. Its helm armor was smooth, very sleek, but it also had two slightly sharp spikes, like little horns.

Whiplash simply snarled at me angrily and pushed. The sparkling's head surged forwards easily. More easily then any other sparkling I had delivered thus far. Starscream clicked softly. "Seekers are easy to birth. They come out quickly, as there are usually multiple if both parents in the relationship are seeker built." He said.

I shifted on my seat, his knee jagged and rather uncomfortable to sit on. "I see." Shifting my hold on the sparkling, I clicked softly. "Alright, Whiplash. Give me three short pushes in the time of three seconds." She rumbled softly in response. "Go."

On the first push, the sparkling moved softly with the contraction, my hands helping guide the little buggart out. On the second push, it was much the same. The third push brought its helm into sight, and enticed a pained hiss from Whiplash as the large helm of it breached the edge of her port. The helm was a dark color, a mottle of blacks and gray colors.

She didn't stop there. Whiplash kept pushing, her hands coming forwards to clutch at her knees- er, knee and stump- and her vents working as she strained to expel her sparkling. Her pushing moved the sparkling forwards all the way to mid shoulders, and gave me a perfect view of a soft and adorable face, along with little triangular wings, much like Starscream's wings, though less Dorito shaped. It was… pretty cute for a slimy, energon, and goop covered little Decepticon baby. Light red optics lit up, and the sparkling let off a soft noise. I smiled at it and pulled a towel forwards, closing my hands around the sparkling softly as Whiplash fell back. She vented harshly.

"Good, Whiplash." I said. "Vary good. Your sparkling is beautiful. It's got your optics."

Whiplash didn't say anything, only panted softly. Then, she sat herself up again and steeled me with a look. "I'm ready to push again."

I arched an eyebrow plate. "Without a contraction?"

She huffed. "Contraction or not, I want this thing out of me, so I can hold it and cuddle it."

Starscream snorted above me. "I still say it's a femme."

"Mech." She shot back snappily, bracing her hands on her knee and stump. "Mothers always know."

I pursed my lips and sighed. "Alright, alright, don't argue now. You'll get to see here in a moment. Now, give me one lone, hard push." Without another word, she bore down and howled in pain as she worked to expel her sparkling. I helped as much as I could, giving added pressure to help pull it along. When the sparkling was half way out, Whiplash's contraction rolled around, making her voice cry out, and then drop into a high pitched keen as she contracted harshly.

The sparkling started to fuss and whine right about the time it fell into the towel on my arms. I drew back, cradling it atop my belly on my chassis. I cooed at it, a little mech by the little rod hanging limply between his legs, and removed another cloth from my subspace to wipe him off with. As soon as he was clean, happily gurgling now that he didn't have all that nasty goop all over him, I stood from Starscream's knee and walked around to Whiplash, settling him gently in her arms. "You have a little mech."

She smiled, and Starscream moved the doctors away from him so he could move closer to his mate. He reached out one bedraggled hand and caressed his sparklings hand and cheek. "You were right." He rasped softly. "A gorgeous little mech. What… do we name him?"

"StarWhip." She answered truthfully. "Our little Starwhip…" She smiled softly, leaning to the side to rest on her mate. It was only then that I realized she was once again bleeding, this time from her valve.

"Ratchet!" I called out to the grumpy medic, getting his attention. He looked up from his work and hurried over to see what the problem was while I tried to stop the bleeding.

"What's happened?" He grunted, looking at the little family and then at me.

"She's bleeding," I grunted. I moved the towels aside to show him and his optic ridges came together.

"What the frag is happening to her?" Starscream suddenly turned angry red optics towards us. "She's slipping away!" He clutched Whiplash's hand in his own good one, obviously lending her strength.

"That's what we're trying to figure out," I told him calmly.

"Work faster!" He snarled, crouching to croon and sooth his still panting mate. Ratchet and I worked to diagnose the problem, all the while trying to stop the profuse bleeding the femme was experiencing.

"Starscream…" She twittered weakly. "If anything happens, you better take care of our son…"

"Don't talk like that," He growled. "You are going to be fine, alright?" I looked up to see her smile… it made my spark constrict.

"The sparkling was too large," Ratchet rumbled softly after doing the Cybertronian equivalent to an ultra-sound. "It tore her internally."

"Save her!" Starscream snarled, optics wild with what I knew was fear.

Within moments, the room was in a flurry of activity as I was moved aside to make room for the others. I took Starwhip from Whiplash and cradled the little mech to my chest as Starscream was currently too focused on his mate.

I looked down at his little faceplates and cooed softly, tickling under his chin as I tried to get him to at least smile. He was distressed, I could tell, as he was most likely confused about what was happening and why his mother was suddenly fading from the bond.

"It's alright, Ratchet knows what he's doing," I murmured softly. Starwhip cooed and whimpered, grasping my finger as tight as he could with both of his little hands.

Alarms began to sound around the room as Starscream was forcefully pushed back away from Whiplash and shoved towards me and Moonracer. He keened pitifully and slid down the wall, burying his face against his hands. His other arm was now fully attached, having been done just after Whiplash had given birth.

"Whiplash!" He moaned helplessly. Minutes passed as the others tried to revive the femme but it was obvious to all of us that it was a useless endeavor. She was gone, passed on into the Well of AllSparks.

"Her spark simply gave out," Ratchet explained to Starscream softly. "The strain of her injuries from Galvatron and then the stress of birthing the sparkling was too much for her to handle."

"All of you are useless!" He hissed, moving to grieve over his lost mate. "I knew I couldn't trust you!" He gathered Whiplash's body close and cradled the limp form against his chest. He keened and sobbed, rocking side to side as he clicked and warbled in broken Cybertronian.

He threw threats at anyone who even attempted to get near him, broken wings rising threateningly as he clutched the body closer to his own, weapons humming to life aggressively. After watching him do this for a short time, I finally got myself up and moved towards him.

"Starscream," I cleared my throat to try and gain his attention. He whipped around and hissed angrily though it subsided once he realized that it was me. His protocols obviously would not allow him to harm a carrying bot… good thing to know. "Put Whiplash down," I spoke as though I were talking with a child, knowing that if I acted aggressive, so too would he. He seemed to think about it before he lowered the frame, his touch lingering for just a moment before he pulled away. As soon as he did however, I shoved his son into his arms. "Whiplash is gone, yes, but you still have Starwhip to look after. You can grieve but please just take care of your son first. Don't make me kick your aft." He snorted at this, probably doubting that I would act on my words but I would if I were forced to.

I watched as the Seeker backed up, cradling his son close and let out a sigh as I covered up Whiplash's body. I had to stay strong but on the inside, it hurt. I'd been determined to save her and the sparkling but in the end, only managed to save the little one. Now I knew how Ratchet felt whenever he lost a patient…

As I watched Starscream and Starwhip though, I realized that not all hope was lost. Many things could happen in the future… and if I could be reborn from human to bot, then maybe Whiplash could be reborn.


End file.
